Do It Yourself Holiday Comfort

The holidays just might be the hardest time of the year to focus on your own needs for comfort and self-care. Current research tells us that people who score high on tests of self-compassion have less depression and anxiety, and tend to be happier and more optimistic. This data suggests that self-compassion can even influence how much we eat and may help some people lose weight! So- wear a ton of self-compassion during the holidays–slather it on like butter and strawberry jam. Fall out of any cycle of self-criticism and love yourself as though you were your own best friend! 

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Ask Dr. Gail:

 On Nov 16, 2011, at 12:11 PM, a subscriber wrote:


I am looking back over the past two years. Between my husband’s dad and mom’s emergencies and passing, our business travel and work… is it appropriate to be so exhausted and emotional? I am so tired all the time and I cry at the drop of a hat. I feel like I have been gunning so hard just to keep moving…


Yes, it’s completely normal. There’s always a post-events let-down when the feelings of grief come pouring out. It’s a good thing and so important that you let the energy of sadness and fatigue be experienced and then allowed to move out of the body. Take extra time now to rest and renew yourself. Write yourself a letter of gratitude for all you’ve done and for the love you’ve given to your family.

Do  you have a question that you want answered?  Email me at and put Ask Dr. Gail in the subject line!


About Dr.Gail Carr Feldman

Dr. Gail Feldman, longtime psychologist, former assistant psychiatry professor, and award-winning author, has published six books, appeared on radio and television programs across the country, including Larry King Live, and has spoken internationally on creativity, resilience and the heroine’s journey. Her current passion is facilitating transformation through the Midlife Crash Course.
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4 Responses to Do It Yourself Holiday Comfort

  1. Thank-you for your kind understanding.

  2. I will work hard to remember this during the holidays this year. The problem is that I always forget to take care of myself amidst all of the external tuggings…..

    • Dr.Gail Carr Feldman says:

      I hope you’re following my advice to slather on the butter and jam of self-compassion (I LOVE that metaphor if I do say so) and take really good care of yourself!

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